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Working hard on trying to find solutions. We found an inexpensive daycare option in a nearby town that will be only slightly out of the way for drop off and pick up for my husband on his work commute.

Of course, middle feels elated, thinking it is a great reward for his shitty behavior, a daycare with kids and games. And no me to deal with.

Middle is making younger feel like he is being left out of great fun. So now little wishes he could also go.

Epic fail.

We are trying to salvage this, make it work. Yet, this morning while I exercised, kids were left unsupervised when hubby went outside. The rule if I am keeping my pets is that middle is never unsupervised around animals. So…rather than admit a mistake, he got defensive and yelled at me. Win for middle…pitting us against each other, and seeing us fight.

I want this to work. But it feels so fucking hard.

It is fucking exhausting.

Saw the doctor and am trying something new for anxiety. Attempt number 4, as the first 3 had side effects I couldn’t deal with.

Let’s pray these meds can calm me.

Tired of constant worry and anger.

Plus, I notice the more stressed I am the more my misophonia bothers me.

Exausted.

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